You detest Thanksgiving. All that family drama mixed with unappetizing side dishes? No thank you!
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You'll make an appearance if you absolutely have to, but you won't enjoy it. You probably don't even like pumpkin pie.
Your ideal Thanksgiving would be spent completely alone... or with the few people that you can tolerate.
You'd eat whatever you want - even in front of the TV if you felt like it. And there's a good chance you wouldn't be eating sweet potatoes with marshmallow. Gag!